This is me now
- D'Estin Perry Sr
- Mar 18
- 7 min read
THIS IS ME NOW(2026)
By D’Estin Perry
If you would’ve asked me years ago who I was, I probably would’ve struggled to answer because back then I was still trying to figure it out myself, searching for love, searching for validation, searching for purpose, trying to make sense of everything I had already been through while still going through it at the same time, but today I can honestly say I know exactly who I am, and I didn’t become her overnight, I became her through pain, through loss, through battles that most people would never even understand, and through seasons that tried to break me but didn’t.
I am a mother first, and that alone comes with a level of love and sacrifice that only a real mother can truly understand, but I am also a mother who has experienced a pain that changes you forever because there is no pain that compares to losing a child, there is no handbook for it, no way to prepare for it, no way to fix it, no way to go back, there is only waking up every day and choosing to keep going even when your heart is shattered, and on October 4th, 2023, my life changed forever when I lost my son, and the truth is a part of me went with him that day, and I will never be the same again.
But what people don’t see is what happens after that, they don’t see the mental battles, the exhaustion, the days where your mind is foggy and your body is tired but life still expects you to show up, they don’t see the nights where you sit and question everything, yourself, your purpose, your strength, even God, and while I was dealing with one of the hardest losses of my life, I was also still in the middle of another battle that had already been going on for years. Years behind closed doors that I never wanted open, Years of embarrassment caught in another situation I didn't see coming I thought I made it out, I thought that season of my life was finally over.
As they say "Welcome to Atlanta huh" Yeah ok and here we go the worst years of my life yet!
My journey with domestic violence didn’t start yesterday, but here I was again it started back in April of 2017, and it carried on for years in ways that people would never even imagine, mentally, emotionally, physically, dealing with situations that I had to learn how to survive while still being a mother, while still trying to build something for myself, while still trying to keep my life together, and that battle didn’t end easily.
Can you imagine being strangled, falling to the ground while your head is repeatedly slammed against it until you pass out… only to wake up and see your children trying to fight off your abuser?
Can you imagine being snatched out of your bed at 4 a.m., grabbed by your neck, choked, and dragged around the room while pregnant… all because you asked a simple question—“Where have you been?”
Or being told, “If you won’t be with me, you won’t be with nobody,” followed by gunfire outside your home in the middle of the night… while you and your children are inside?
Can you imagine having to secretly report abuse involving your own children, having evidence… and still nothing happens?
Can you imagine getting calls? "Hey man I really think you should protect yourself" "Hey man I don't put nothing past nobody never!"
Have you ever felt trapped… but still looked free?
Fight after fight, behind closed doors, I was battling and not being heard. A system that was built to protect me failed me and my children, and somehow, I still found the strength to smile and keep moving forward, holding on to hope that one day the right move would come.
I promised my son we were leaving. I just needed time. I just needed a plan.
But I wasn’t fast enough.
I couldn’t figure it out fast enough.
And while I was silently fighting…
I lost the biggest battle, loudly.
October 4th—a day that replays in my mind every second.
A loss I carry with me every day.
A moment that changed everything.
And a pain that will never leave me… because in that moment, I felt like I failed my son… I failed my children.
It followed me all the way into December of 2024 when custody was filed against me after I continued and tried to move forward with my life and start something new, and what came with that wasn’t just a custody battle, it was yet a system that failed me, a system that questioned me, a system that tried to paint me out to be something I am not, a system that didn’t see me, didn’t hear me, and didn’t protect what mattered most to me, and that type of pain hits different because now I'm not just grieving, I'm fighting at the same time, fighting for your child, fighting for your name, fighting for your truth while still trying to heal.
But what people failed to understand about me is that I don’t break, I bend, I cry, I have days where I feel like I can’t take no more, but I do not stay there, and even in the middle of everything I kept going, I kept building, I kept showing up not just for myself but for other people too, because that’s who I am, even when I was hurting I was still helping other mothers, still pouring into people, still creating opportunities for women, still trying to build something bigger than me.
At the same time, I made a decision to go back to nursing school, and not only did I go back, I made the honor roll, something I had never done in my life coming from a 7th grade dropout and 7th grade education, and that alone says a lot about the woman I’ve become because I refused to let my past define my future, I went on to obtain multiple certifications in the medical and beauty field, became a licensed instructor in both, and pushed myself to levels I never even imagined I would reach, I worked to get my accreditation from the state of Georgia to open my Medical Beauty Institute license, while still running my hair restoration clinic and operating a CLIA waived lab, while still creating jobs and training opportunities for other mothers and women who needed a chance, because I know what it feels like to need one.
While all of this was going on, I also stepped into rooms and positions that I never even imagined for myself, becoming one of the founding 100 members and ambassadors of the Atlanta Black Chambers through Miss Morale Ocain, continuing to build connections and open doors not just for myself but for others as well, and even through my pain I was still able to turn it into purpose by watching alongside State Representative Dexter Sharper to help pass legislation for ice cream truck safety, creating Cari’s Law in honor of my son, and to see my son recognized with an official proclamation, October 4th being A’Cariyon Dwight Perry Day here in South Fulton, that alone means more to me than words could ever explain.
And the truth is, I did all of this after losing my son, while grieving, while fighting, while trying to hold myself together, while navigating some of the hardest times of my life on my own, and I’m not saying that to be praised, I’m saying it because this is my reality, this is what strength looks like, this is what it looks like when you don’t have a choice but to keep going, when people are depending on you, when your purpose is bigger than your pain.
There were days I didn’t know how I was going to make it, days I was mentally drained, emotionally exhausted, physically tired, but I stood on all ten and I pushed through anyway, because I realized something through all of this, I was never just going through it, I was being built through it, built into the woman I am today, built into a leader, built into a voice, built into someone who can now help other women who are going through their own battles.
That is where Broken Silence came from, because I refuse to be silent about anything I’ve been through, that silence has been broken, and my life has now shifted into a new direction, a new chapter that I never asked for but one that I now walk in with purpose, the grieving mothers club, and everything I do now is different because it’s deeper, it’s not just about building businesses anymore, it’s about rebuilding lives, it’s about helping women heal while still showing up for their life, it’s about helping them regain their mental clarity, their strength, their focus, and their purpose.
This is me now, not perfect, not untouched by pain, not finished, but evolving, healing, growing, leading, and standing in my truth unapologetically because I know who I am and I know what I’ve been through to become her, and one thing I know for sure is my story is not over, in fact it’s just getting started.
This is Broken Silence.
This is real life.
This is healing while still having to show up.
If you’re reading this and you’re still standing… keep going.
Your story isn’t over.
And if you’re ready to rebuild your mind, your focus, and your life while healing,
join me inside Broken Silence: Heal Momma Heal.
Your next chapter starts now!.
Stay tuned..........................
Broken Silence: Heal Momma Heal
Real stories of grief, survival, healing, and hustling while rebuilding your life.
This story is part of the upcoming book
Broken Silence – The True Life Story of D'Estin Perry Sr
By DEstin Perry Sr March 18, 2026 at 2:12 am